Never ending pasta bowl???

So Olive Garden has the never ending pasta bowl.... Vegas has their massive buffets... There the song that never ends, and the Never Ending Story... People say love never ends.

But today Smirk and I decided that we need to have other never ending things in our lives. For one, we want a never ending supply of shampoo and conditioner. Pipes that run into our house, directly into our showers. It would be great if they could have pumps and we could always have shampoo and conditioner!

We also want a never ending supply of milk... I used to think we wanted a cow but where the hell would we put a 1 ton animal? It wont fit in our front walk, the neighbors might object to the smell. And I think the gardeners would be very pissed off about the manure, although it is natural!! So we decided that just like water into the fridge, we want milk... Again, more pipes, but hey, it could work!!

Our last "never ending" is gas... Not sure how that one would work... Magic, tanker trucks following us around, or just free gas for life. But I think every body wants that one... Although if we just had cars that ran on solar or by splitting the atom, we wouldn't need never ending gas.

So, what "never ending" things do you want in your life???

Why bother having children...

People confuse me! Alot... The reason for this confusion are parents. For instance, Smirk has two best friends who left for college this weekend. As the adoptive mommy, I was required to drive to Santa Barbara to help them settle. As the adoptive mommy who doesn't get along with the real mommy, I was not going to go until real mommy left. Smirk and I started our drive at 11:30am.
We got to Santa Barbara (which is only about 100 miles away) 3 hours later. Traffic sucked because people cant drive, but not the point.

Pony Princess and Pimp Daddy (the two friends) had left with their respective parents at 6am. Pony princess' mother and sister drove her up to the campus, help her dump her stuff into a bin and carry said stuff up the stairs and then LEFT.

Pimp Daddy's mum, drove up there, help him unload, helped him make his bed, realized they didn't have some supplies, took Pony Princess, Pimp Daddy and Lane (another bff) to the store (about a 1/2 hour away), purchased stuff, bought them all lunch, made sure PD had everything he could need, called every relative known to man to show her pride in her college man....

So when adoptive mommy gets there, Pony Princess has made her bed, tried to unload her stuff in the 12 x 1o closet she shares with 2 other girls. She is completely unorganized. Being the last girl to arrive, she gets a desk, a small two drawer dresser, and 1/3 of each wardrobe. She also gets the top bunk, which is fine, except she had made her bed without washing her sheets or airing out the memory foam pad. The memory foam pad that MY AUNTIE purchased her, and the sheets that I purchased for her... Her real mommy did nothing. She didn't stay to help, she didn't help put things away, she didn't go through the room checklist to determine what the kid might need, she just left....

So being my normal mild mannered self, I sat idly by and let poor Pony Princess flounder and struggle... NOT!! Of course I took charge... We went through her room, marked out things that were wrong, made a list of what she didn't have but would need ( a chair pad for the really hard wooden desk chair) We didn't have paper to make the list so Smirk wrote all of the items on her hands... She looked like the guy from the movie Memento. Then we toured the campus, finding things, helping her get hooked up to the Internet, find the food court area, find fun things to do for the next week, help her find the job center. By the time we left, I was exhausted.

But why didn't her own mother do all of this? Why just dump the kid off and bail. Why not help her? Did she just have 5 children to have minions to take out the trash?? And especially this kid, out of the 5, Pony Princess is the only one who is not a mother at 16, or a drug addict and the only one going to college... Wouldn't you want to do extra for her???

This whole day made Smirk very sad. Not only because two of her bff's are far away, but she really wants to go away to experience college life. I understand too... I want to get away but not for college life.... How about tropical island life?? Rich heiress life?? Idle rich life??? Those would work for me...

School Daze...

September has come!! School has started for all the amused girls. Grin gets up at 5:30am so she can be in her first class of the day starting at 6:41am. So in turn the chauffeur gets up at 5:00am just to make sure the happy girl gets moving! I blearily make peanut butter sammies at 6am and get ready to drive her away. Her first class is Spanish...How one can concentrate on a foreign language at 6:40 in the morning is beyond me especially since I have a difficulty with English at that time. Meanwhile Smirk sleeps in until 8:30ish, since her first class doesn't start until 10:30am.

Grin is loving school (no surprise there) while Smirk is sad... Her friends are all leaving for college this next weekend and she feels like she is missing out on an experience by staying at home and going to community college. She understands why she needs to do it and agrees it is smart and the best choice for us, but it is hard. She wants a dorm room and to go away and try to learn on her own.

But Smirk will meet new people...She had her first job interview yesterday. We dressed her up in one of my suit dresses and pearls (she spruced it up with a belt and pretty shoes) and went down to the Marriott Renaissance Club Sport. She interviewed to be a Kid Club attendant, basically a babysitter for the rich and snooty members who go to this spa/fitness center/hotel and bring their children. When she got back, I of course, peppered her with questions... The conversation went something like this (please keep in mind, I did have about 5 cups of coffee)

Me: So, how did it go??
Smirk: it was good
Me: Good? Did you like the place? What was the job? Were the people nice?
S: It was...
M: What do they want you to do? Did they tell you when they would call and let you know if you got it? Did you get a card of the person you spoke to?
S: It would...
M: Did you tell them about your school schedule? Were they willing to work with you on that??
S: MOTHER... SHUT UP for 2 minutes and I will tell you everything...
M: Sorry.....
S: It was fine, I like the place, I would be a babysitter, the people were nice... What else do you want to know??? SLOWLY... And by the way, no more coffee...
M: Did you get the name and business card of the person who interviewed you...
S: No, her name was Hope, but why would I get her card...
M: How will you send her a thank you letter?
S: What ever...
M: but... You have.. You need to...
S: Whatever, but on a good note.. There was a way hot guy working there!
M: AAARRRGGGHHH!!!

Maybe I need to start spiking my coffee....