Damn them to the first gate of hell!!!

I went to the store near my office to get some lunch and upon walking into the store I was greeted by a sweet little girl in a green jumper!!! I was soo excited! COOKIES!!! Yes! I could taste the thin mints while I searched for my salad and other boring diet food... I got to the check out line... Where I felt oddly out of place.. The woman in front of me was purchasing 6 bottles of wine and two packages of cigarettes for her trip to Vegas while the two women behind me were each purchasing 2 bottles of wine and at least 3 packs of easter chocolate... I had a salad, pack of gum and some quaker rice snacks... Anyway... I get my $10 cash back and rush to the exit doors.... ONLY TO FIND THE LITTLE BRATS WERE GONE! How dare they tease me! They should be tortured! My thighs & waist band thank them but my brain and tastebuds were sorely upset. As I type this I sit eating the quaker rice snacks pretending they are thin mints... It just isnt fair...